You're still my Bestfriend,
Its always difficult when a friend drifts apart from you. Its even more painful when it happens to your best friend.
Why did I always have to cry for something I know I can no longer hold on to? This is the question that boggles my mind all the time. I always feel like crying whenever I get the chance to remember the moments my friend and I used to spend together. I know I should just accept the sad truth that things will never go back to normal between the two of us, but it hurts me. It's just so hard to let go of something that was such a big part of my life. Some people say I should simply value the time I’m spending apart from my best friend so i can discover myself that was just too painful for me to do. Now i ask myself,"What went wrong?".
We bonded and eventually led to a sense of belonging. I treasured those moments when i treated him as my "Kuya". We grew closer but despite all my expectations that we’d better friends, we eventually got into a misunderstanding. I have started to feel empty since then.
I have accepted my mistakes and have tried to apologize but its just to tough to win his friendship, though he’s no longer interested to be my friend. I know I must start to say the word "Goodbye", but it will cost me countless tears before I recover. I once told myself that I'm being silly, and that I probably don't deserve to have a best friend like him, but its difficult to pretend that I'm not affected.
Some people say that if you truly treasure someone as a friend,it doesn't matter how much he has failed you. The important thing is that you still trust and accept that someone as a friend no matter what. The trust and acceptance he had for me is no longer there and I really can't blame him . If that's the way he wants it to be. but our memories will remain alive and i will treasure them forever!
Eventually, I know that when we leave behind the conflict, we’ll both be alright in the end. Each of us have our own lives to lead. After failed attempts to become his friend again, I realize that it might be good for him to go live his life and welcome more acquaintances. It's painful, but I have to respect his decision and let him be free. I know our friendship didn't last or work out the way I expected it to, but i'm glad our paths once crossed in high school. I know I could no longer look for another person exactly like him and I know its unlikely for him to return to me. But i'm still hoping even if it takes forever.
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